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The very last time I held you.

The very last time I held you was the hardest day of my life.

I had given birth to you over a week before so naturally my body was longing to feed you, my arms were longing to hold you, my eyes were desperately wanting to watch you every single second.

It was so unnatural having to call the funeral directors to ask to see my baby. It was so unnatural to not have you with me every moment following your delivery. Everything was so unnatural. It was painful. It hurt every part of me and I just longed for you.

Your smell, your touch, your perfect little face.

I will never, ever, ever forget every precious moment that I had you physically here for. I cherish everything from your blanket to your photos and will do forevermore.

My silent tears are not heard by many but they regularly flow as I look at the impact that you’ve had on my life, our families life.

I love you sweet Oscar-Jensen. I adore you with all that I am.

Love Mummy ♥️

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